As a child, I remember lying in my bed with tears in my eyes pondering over how a perfect father had looked like. I often asked myself whether a perfect father is someone who will hug me tight and tell me he loves me every day? Or is he someone who will lift me on his knee to talk? Or is he someone who will put his arms around me or hold my hands tightly that I would be lost somewhere?
When our earthly fathers fail to give us the love and attention that we seek, our spirits yearn for a father who is not just ordinary but perfect. I was one such poor soul who’d imagined that everyone had a perfect dad in their lives but me. So, the only person who I could look up to and throw my babyish tantrums was at our great God. Irrespective of all my crankiness and resentment, my amazing God kept pouring out His choicest blessings on me. He helped me complete my Post-Graduation; He blessed me with an excellent job, so on and so forth. But ‘I’ was never ready to understand His mighty love.
As I continued to doubt his handiwork, God kept waiting with his arms wide open to help me experience His fatherly love. On June 14, 2013, I got introduced to a very beautiful community called, Couples for Christ India. While I sat in one of the first rows at Snehadaan (where the Christian Life Seminar was held), I heard the first session on “God’s Love”. I wept. I wept. I wept like a child. My tears were falling uncontrollably. I asked myself, “Don’t you already know that you don’t have a father? So, why are you crying then?” I soon realized that I cried because I had failed all these days to acknowledge that I had ‘A Father’.
A Father who is the king of kings, A Father who is ready to lavish His love on me, A Father who will give me whatever I ask, A Father who is ready to own me as his child, A Father who will carry me in His heart like a shepherd holding his lamb, A Father who is waiting to call me as His little princess, A Father who will walk with me when I’m distressed, A Father who is just perfect, and A Father whom I dreamt of!
Even when I let God down, even when I fouled things up, I pictured the proudest father the world had ever seen. Just like how the baby screams, dribbles and dirties himself, yet dad still glows with pride…Somewhat like that. I imagined if an earthly father could be so patient and glow with pride, how much more my heavenly father would have been. How did I ignore His lavish love? How did I turn deaf to Him when He was screaming his lungs out calling me as his daughter? How did I???
I was tired of being sad. I was tired of crying. I was tired of being lonely. Only by His grace, I experienced the intimacy of a father and daughter relationship. I started to talk to Him, He gave me the privilege to call Him ‘Dadda’ (which I secretly longed for), and now it has been precisely eight months and 22 days, after I gave my heart to Him. The more I began to know Him, the deeper I wanted to know Him. The more I began to love Him, the greater I wanted to love Him. The more I trusted Him, the more I wanted to trust Him.
Now I call out to Him each day. I’m His little princess. I close my eyes and hug Him tight and continue to be cranky at times. He is my awesome Dadda. He changed my life and if you give Him an opportunity, He will change yours too because He is a Perfect Father.
“I will be a Father to you and you will be my sons and daughters,” says the Lord Almighty. (2 Corinthians 6:18 & 2 Samuel 7:14)